Sometimes You Want To Just Be

It is okay to just be.

Let me explain. It seems like a good many of my friends and colleagues always need to be doing.

Something. Anything.

Their lives and the lives of their significant others and their children are programmed 24×7. Even when they say they are taking time to relax or sit and talk with others they have to have a plan – an agenda. I find no fault with planning. In fact, my significant other, Joann, would most likely accuse me of over-planning. But, I also allow myself to just be.

Here’s what I see that I don’t understand. And, the fact I don’t isn’t a negative as far as I’m concerned. The last thing I’d want to have happen is for me to understand other peoples needs to fill every hour with something that they think needs to be done.

My friends say need and should a lot when I ask them why they just don’t take a moment to do nothing – which is really doing something. I often think that many of them don’t want to be alone with themselves. And, others can’t find it in their minds to give themselves permission. To leave the mind and focus on your heart, soul, or essence – whatever you choose to call it – is both powerful and scary. That’s where the real you is located. You’re not your mind.

I like to listen to music and close my eyes – but not all the way. This morning it was Jeff Beck, Jackson Browne, Chet Baker, Keller Williams, and Stevie Ray Vaughan. I find by not closing my eyes all the way I can defocus and look at a light and have my own personal light show. For some reason this lets me meditate and just be. I usually find myself smiling a lot during these times.

When my friends talk about wishing they had more time to do what they want to do I feel badly for them. I know we can’t ALWAYS do what we want. But, we don’t always have to do what we think we should or what we think we need to do either. Recently, I had a friend want me to meet her a few hours away while she was traveling in the area. It sounded like a good idea and I’d enjoy spending time being with her. But, this is a friend who feels the need to fill every moment with doing something that leads to accomplishing something that leads to — well, whatever she thinks it needs to lead to. And, so she felt the need to try and organize meetings and accomplish something. By joining her, I would be joining in her craziness and while maybe it is something she really wants to do – I think it more something she really thinks she should or needs to do.

I have friends who went to southern Spain last year. They programmed every single hour and when they got home they were exhausted in both body and soul. They would have felt and lived more of the soul of the area if they had found a seat in cafe and asked questions and listened.

It always comes back to listening first for me.

And, I’d recommend listening to yourself first too. I’ll give you permission if you need someone to tell you it is okay.

You know. Your real self. Your heart, soul, and essence.

Photo courtesy of mindfulness’ Photostream

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